Well Goodness Me!
You know, I use to roll my eyes at people who would alter language subtly because of the impact they said it had. And now I get it. There are so many ways we can look at a situation, and our mindset really determines how we perceive any given event.
So what filters are you going to use? What are you going to tell yourself about a situation? Are you going to empower yourself, or smash your own efforts? Let me explain…
Hi! This is Kathryn, I’m from Women Seeking Wisdom, and today I just wanted to talk to you just very briefly about having a look at maybe what words you use when you talk to yourself to other people, self-talk and how that certain things can direct our thoughts.
So “I should go to the gym”, “I should eat less”, “I should do this”, “I should do that”. “I should be a better parent”. It’s a horrible guilt word.
So replacing it with “could”. You know, I’m not the kind of person who really likes to be nitty gritty and picky, but this is actually one that really does make quite a difference. Your self-talk is really really huge and if you’re going to be guilting yourself all the time or getting guilt from other people “you should”.
I mean, you don’t really think about it. How our language and self-talk really does direct our actions, our day or our perception. So more than anything actually, if you don’t take anything away from this, have a think about changing your “shoulds” to “coulds” or “would” or”can”, maybe instead of “should”. Because you know, then it’s just like “I’m still not reaching the bar”.Change your 'shoulds' to 'coulds'. Otherwise it's just like 'I'm still not reaching the bar'.Click To Tweet
So I mean it’s always great to have goals and everything like that,
I’m really big on that, but you do need to sort of just be happy with who you are right now and understand and give yourself a little bit of a break too sometimes. I think a lot of us women we tend to just really be quite hard on ourselves and perfectionists.
So a really good author, if you’ve never heard of “Louise Hay” she is, I think she’s in her nineties now actually. She’s awesome! She’s one woman who, she became an author I thinking at 60s or 70s. She came out I think it was in the 1990s. She talks a lot about “Self-Affirmations”. So you look in the mirror and you say “I am awesome” or “I am enough” actually is one that I do – “I am enough”. So she is really really good if you want to Google her and have a look.
But she has a lot of you know she talks about a lot of subconscious retraining by continuously telling yourself the same thing which science has proven since then of course that it actually does work. What you tell yourself over and over and over again and having these little affirmations is really really good to retrain your mind.
And the idea is we can only perceive about, I think, it’s about ten percent to probably even less of what’s going on around us at any given time. So what we choose to perceive will have a lot to do with our self talk. So I hope that makes sense, but if it doesn’t shoot me a comment or something, and I’ll explain it a bit more. But basically our minds can only focus on so much. We have so much information going on around us, when we have a conver… even when we have a conversation with someone we always, our backstory and everything always dictate what we kind of “hear” in the conversation.
So very much, like it’s amazing how much comes back to some really really simple things: like self-talk, gratitude and this perception. So yeah, like a really small percentage anyways of everything that we hear, we actually consciously focus on.
So what do you want to focus on?
Do you want to focus on something really good? And you know, lead your mind into a successful pattern, or do you want to continue possibly some self-destructive ways. Because I know a lot of us have that. So whether we like it or not, I should have looked up some statistics before I started this, because I know that there are a lot out there.
That’s all probably in “The Secret” or “The Abundance Factor” actually. All those things. Bruce Lipton is a really good person to check out for subconscious retraining. And yes. So there’s a few there anyway. “The Abundance Factor” movie. That’s really good.
So just more than anything, just reflect today I guess.
I’d like to encourage you. Are you being really hard on yourself saying, “should should should!” all the time? “Should go to the gym”, “I’m sh***y at this.” “I should, you know, be a better parent”, or whatever, instead of saying “could”.
You know, how could that just change your day?
And yeah! What are you focusing on? And can you in some way build yourself up with some affirmations like, one of the biggest ones, “You are enough”, “I am enough”. So many of us, I think particularly women today, we don’t believe that we are enough!
So you know, repeating that to yourself throughout your day quietly if you like. “I am enough”. So yeah, anyways. I just, you know, I’m not a nitpicker or anything normally and I don’t think this is nit-picking. This is actually quite important. But yeah, just directing our thoughts into a way that’s going to help us achieve goals and build us up and make us happy. As opposed to a glass half full.
Anyways! I hope you’re having a wonderful day! I will shut up now! And I will catch you late!r I’d love to hear any feedback if you want to leave me a comment! It’s always really really helpful and encouraging and I’d love to know what you think anyway!
Thank you and take care of you!
See ya! 😀